I bet you never thou-
motherfucker what is this shit, sand? fuck sand. i hate sand. thanks, mom. thanks for absolutely nothing, leaving me here on this fucking beach, is that a fucking seagull? oh my god, mom, you suck more than anything has ever sucked. i’m getting to that ocean just so i can urinate on your carapace. i’m gonna urinate on it so hard. fucking sand. i think five of my brothers just got eaten. good, i hated those assholes. i’m coming, mom. you’ve got blood on your flippers, bitch.
Well since I can’t actually be happy, I might as well pretend.
St. Bernard too scared to climb down the stairs
Doctor: do you drink or smoke?
Doctor: (under his breath) what a loser